wond3rlandx@hotmail.com
taiying
happy girl
happy girl
i feel like im being stuffed with food. haha.
fattening fattening fattening!
so i'm now offically a proud dragonfly member.
i know lotsa ppl probably doesnt like fly. but who cares! i like it there!
gonna dine at kuishinbo tonight! 4 hrs more. so looking fore to it lah! muahahahhahahahahha. life still treats me gd after all.
always saying and doing the wrong things. hais.
something like paranoid gf who thinks that smth is going on between me and her bf.
once, i asked a friend to hang out at the voiddeck late at night. then the gf saw the sms and my friend even had to call me up and clarify things with her listening.
why wouldnt ppl believe that male and female can be pure friends? why is it that the perception ppl have when a couple hang ard in the void deck means smth? bullshit.
the only male friend who doesnt invite rumours and gossips is bai. bai & i are so bloody close that we can even say gdnight, love ya. it's those 'chun chun' pure friendship that can last forever.
i am lonely and i need friends! too bad they are all hard to come by. can i buy them instead?
oh yes, ob says he's going down to fly. i wanna go too. but im having car prac lessons tml aftnn, and ob is not going to leave fly until 6am.
lousy! feeling damn lousy! when ur friend is enjoying and you cant. stucked at home with the bloodyass com.
been drink drank drunk lately because that's supposedly the easiest way to past my useless time. and maybe because i am only either alone at home or at cdc. that's y incidents at cdc are surprisingly funny and interesting.
and. one of my gd friend is not speaking to me anymore. he says that because i wont be with him, so he doesnt want to talk to me anymore. i really dont understand. why cant male and female be just gd friends? by doing this, he just created a sore loser image in my mind. women are hard to please and understand. bai says that just like men doesnt understand women, women doesnt understand men too. so true. what is going on in men's mind?
reminds me of an old incident.
once, i had this very gd girl friend. we were quite close together. took alot of neoprints together. then she had a boyfriend who was my ex. then finally, one day the guy told her that he still have feelings for me. but that time i didnt know abt it. then suddenly she doesnt talk to me anymore. then i think i ask our common friend, then she told me that her bf broke up with her because of me. that's y she doesnt want to talk to me anymore. then after that i stray away from tt bunch of friends and got into bad company. then quit school.
i think i've added her in friendster when friendster just started and tt time she didnt talk to me already. and she didnt accept me lah. then, its like... broke off all connections already. wasnt able to find her in fb now.
really miss her alot. alot of times i flip thru my photo album and saw the whole whooping 2 pages of neoprints. i wonder how is she now. i ask my ex abt her. he says that she saw her once in town and dont know rumours from where says that she's not straight anymore. i hope she's really alright.
we're gonna have a gathering soon for sec sch. i didnt see her getting tag in the group photos taken from sec sch. so im guessing she doesnt know abt the gathering and noboby else have contacts with her anymore. i wish i could see her in the gathering.
anw, abt the bad bruises on my leg. it's not getting any better cause i dont put zambak on it. i hate zambak! i dont know why its so hard to waste it off and it leaves my leg sticky! i tried using soap but it doesnt get off! i cant scrub it real hard cause its painful. urgghhh....
that's why my bruises is not getting any better. it's like a permanent stain there.
and im hooked on watching videos on that tiny 2.5inch screen in the dark on my bed. it's super super bad for my eyesight. but it just tempts me, induce me to do that. i've been watching bleach on that mp4. downloading the file is not really a prob using bittorrent. but transferring the file using the creative centrale software is really a big headache. first, they have to convert the file to a .cmv format. as far as i know its not a really common format right? converting takes a v long time. and it lags my com as well. i lost my pack of cig then. half empty. amounts to sgd5. lousy me.
morning woke up with a shock. bad bruises on my leg and backside painful! i think i fell down alot ytd. damn. there's at least 4 obvious blue-black on my leg. its so ugly!
ob says that i bang into chairs. and i think he mentioned ytd that i fell down.
urgh...
i'm thinking what to tell mummy. she'd be pretty sure that i was abused by some guys. SH tells me that i should tell mummy that i drink and got drunk, cant stand properly and knock into chairs. rubbish! lol.
i need to go to the library soon. i need books to numb myself.
i'd go a big detour if a cat or dog or pigeons is standing in my way. i dont mind that, really. say if im walking on a pavement beside the road. then a cat or dog of pigeons come along, i'll walk on the road. tested and proved before already. tt's why i always say, if one day i die, it's surely the fear that caused it. damn these animals.
oh yes. mummy cooked chilli crab on sat night. i pricked & cut my finger while eating. i'm so damn gd at eating crabs. -.-
me & xingrong studying at the airport, t3 foodcourt.
loves,
tiring days spent studying and drinking. i've totally master how to drink on the first night and wake up to study at tp ard 1pm. COOL. anw, going to and fro tp is a chore. it's absolutely so near but i have to change 3 buses to reach tp. then, usually on my way home, i dont changed the last bus. i walked approx 3 bus stops home! after a long day of studying somemore!
my room is totally messy now. filled with stacks of books, loose papers, clothes. arghh..
oh yes, my 3 exams is on consecutive days and the 1st exams is at acjc. it's totally so far away from sengkang. i expect the journey time to be at least 2 hrs. so, on the first day, my exam will end at 6.30pm. then i'll reach home at 8.30?! and the 2nd day paper is the paper which i sucked at most.
i hate exams. but who dont?
me and bai on friday. one of my best best long time friend.
once, i smsed xr if he's going to study outside because i dont wan to stay at home doing nothing. then he's going tp to study the next day. then he replied me "then u better go and slp so tml i can bring u to tp". from tt sms onwards, i proclaim him as one of my best friends. haha. he's so brotherly lah. so my wkdays were all spent at tp with xr and phil. not so bad, with xr so funny and phil so muscular. LOL
tp's food is cheap cheap and cheap! but because it is cheap, so its not so very nice lah. drinks were totally diluted ones. eg the Ribena.
which of it is real? humans are the most complicated animals ever. too clever and hence, too evil.
i know it will be over soon. grind my teeth and get over with it.
i'm going down for a walk. had enough of coping at home!
Robbie Williams - To Be A Better Man
Send someone to love me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain
Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel Im getting old
Before my time
As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord Im doing all I can
To be a better man
Go easy on my conscience
cause its not my fault
I know I've been taught
To take the blame
Rest assured my angels
Will catch my tears
Walk me out of here
Im in pain
As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord Im doing all I can
To be a better man
Once youve found that lover
You're homeward bound
Love is all around
Love is all around
I know some have fallen
On stony ground
But love is all around
Send someone to love me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain
Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel Im getting old
Before my time
As my soul heals the shame
I will grow
through this pain
Lord Im doin all I can
To be a better man
I had a nightmare today. i dreamt tt one of my teeth has fallen out. in that dream, i found out that my 'back' teeth were getting loose. i used my tongue to flick it and suddenly, woosh. the teeth fall out. and my mouth were filled with blood. the taste and smell of blood were so strong and real. and so, i googled what it means to have that kind of dream, since dreaming of falling teeth is so common.
some says that it means u're concern or worried abt appearance. some says it means someone close to u is in bad health. some says it means wealth is comming because of the toothfairy myth.
well, i keep having weird dreams often, so im not really bothered by it. but im going buy some lottery tml. haha.
this morning, i woke up with nothing to do, no where to go. this is the first time in 1mth. and im so not used to it. i woke up crying and in a super bad mood lurh. i just cant get used to the not working life at all even after so long. for the coming wks until mid june, im suppose to be at home studying everyday. which means tt i'd be waking up with nowhere to go and nothing to do everyday. shucks! then wouldnt i be in bad and sobby mood every morning? HELL NO!
i've painted both my toes nails and fingernails midnight blue. it's a nice colour and smell from anna sui. it's one of my prized possession! but midnight blue nails feels like as if i've been poisoned. well... pink still makes a better nail colour.
Leonardo da Vinci exhibition opens on May 16 at science centre! (link)
I AM SO GOING!